There are things that you agree to in life for charity that seem a little crazy…a little out there….a little mad…..and there is a reason they seem that way.
They are.
I had agreed to take part in a local Aerobathon – 10 back to back sessions of Aerobics in 5 hours.
I agreed thinking…this is ok – I regularly run between 5-6 miles twice a week with running club….5 hours of Aerobics will be easy. I was clearly remembering the Aerobics sessions I used to attend when I was 18…the sessions where I would stand at the back and giggle with my friends whilst sticking relatively closely *ish* to the moves the instructor was making at the front…..the classes that happened before I had children and lost the flexibility of youth…..the classes that were created by Jane Fonda types where the moves were simple….before the plank was invented….before Zumba….before Tabata.
Tabata!!!…what is that I hear you ask…..my thoughts exactly…so I asked my friend…”what does that mean?”…and her reply…it’s a workout where you mix a bit of weights and floor stuff and legs and abs and stuff together in little sets.
Well that sounds easy enough…..
Oh the fool that I am….there were 2 Tabata sessions…although one had been called Bootcamp…..which I understood – so I was more nervous about it – the floor work did not involve rest as much as it did dozens and dozens of repeated crunches, planks…weird upside down climbing (running) up ladder whilst in press up things…..and these were interspersed with bursts of 5 minutes of cardio…fast cardio.
There was a Gynmastics session where the instructor
said his class would be the calm easy one in the mix of the fast cardio workouts and he would concentrate on our core…and then he made us do variations of the plank and tummy crunches in yogo poses for 30 minutes…..I don’t think I liked him very much.
There was a lady with a hippy dippy nature who came in to teach us “bellyfit”…which sounded as though it would be like Indian Belly dancing but was clearly a high impact, torture version of it…half way through she panted “that is the first 15 minutes of cardio…grab yourself water and let’s get those smiles back on & do it all over again”…but then we knew what we were about to do ….again….and it wasn’t freaking belly dancing from a Bollywood film!
The 2 Zumba sessions (different instructors) were really fast…leaving your head spinning when you tried to work out if you actually managed to get all the moves correctly. The instructors performing the moves in front of us whilst pulling “sexy” faces and with writhing arms to show us that not only should we be keeping up with the fast pace…not missing any steps for fear of looking like a bunch of numpties….but somehow we should look like Latin American Goddesses at the same time – tuh!
And the hardest one of the day was innocently titled “Aerobics”…just to make you think you were going to cope….the instructor had joined in every other session that day & just before her class her hubbie came to show his support, bringing her little toddler for a cuddle…….don’t be under illusions the baby is part of the master plan…as was the flower neatly positioned in her hair….and then she struck – with leg crunching, high kicking, squats and lunges and jumping jacks and finished off with what felt like hundreds of planks & press ups and planks on one arm….and oh my goodness that flower in her hair was a con…..she was like a demon.
My back today feels as though someone really big sat on it.
My legs tremble when I stand up.
The inside of my shoulders feel as though they have been punched….lifting a heavy kettle is not going to happen….lifting a cup of tea was hard enough!
I appreciate fitness is vital – oxygenating cells & all the important stuff that I keep reminding you again and again…..and I do stick by those words…..honestly I do.
But I didn’t do this for fitness…..I did this for money… so that research into Melanoma can find a cure because Melanoma still kills 7 people every single day in this country and that statistic is only getting worse. So far all these “wonder drugs” that have been coming out have only been able to add a few extra months onto the lives of a Melanoma patients – a year if lucky…none of them can stop the monster in it’s tracks…..and that is why I did 5 hours of Aerobics.
There is still time to sponsor my pained efforts should you be able to ….. I really do appreciate it x
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